After being burgled, Black Books gets a new alarm and security door fitted, but Manny fails to listen to the unlock code, distracted by a little Subbuteo player in the installer's hair ("there was a little man ... in his hair"). This quickly results in Manny being trapped alone inside with only a quickly-emptied bottle of Absinthe and dead bees for company and Bernard locked outside with just enough money for popcorn and a cinema ticket. Meanwhile, Fran has taken the phone off the hook to listen to silky-voiced Howell Granger read the shipping forecast on the radio, leaving Bernard to wander the streets of London penniless, cold and wet, with only an adult video shop and the allure of fast-food employment between him and freezing. (Guest stars Nick Frost as the alarm installer, Peter Serafinowicz as Howell Granger, writer Graham Linehan as a fast food customer and Tony Way as the fast food chain and cinema employee.)
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